(c) 2008, Timothy P. Bete and Cap'n Billy "The Butcher" MacDougall

Table of Contents
PART 1: Introduction

How I Met Cap’n Billy and Why You Should Raise Your Children to Be Pirates

PART 2: Cap’n Billy “The "Butcher”MacDougall ’s                Guide to Pirate Parenting

Baby Pirates—Mapping Out Your Child’s Future

Belly Timber—Feeding Your Pirate

Sleeping Like a Seadog and Other Nocturnal Issues

Quelling Mutinies—Disciplining Your Pirate

Scurvy and Hook Injuries—Pirate Health and Safety

Your Pirate’s First Ship—How to Convert Your Minivan into a Pirate Schooner

As Your Pirate Gets Older (The Teen Years and Beyond)

Cap’n Billy’s 100%
Money-Back Guarantee
Cap’n Billy “The Butcher” MacDougall is so confident his advice will turn your child into a pirate, he guarantees results. If you follow the instructions in this book and your child does not become a pirate, Cap’n Billy will refund the full purchase price of this book.*

* This guarantee assumes you have applied the principles in this book with your child for a period of 18 years. It also assumes you can find Cap’n Billy and that he remembers the guarantee. To claim a refund, you must bring your child to Cap’n Billy and let him decide whether your child is really a pirate or not. Cap’n Billy reserves the right to make refunds in salt cod in lieu of cash, not that he plans to give any refunds.

Guide to Pirate Parenting

Cap'n Billy "The Butcher" MacDougall's
The hysterically funny parody of parenting advice books
Get the FREE
e-book version of